Mikey's Meanderings

The Labour Party should really avoid Twitter

2012-01-06T14:48:00.003Z

Hot on the heels of Diane Fatbott's latest idiotic, racist tweet (I imagine they do not pick her up out of concern for their vehicle's suspension) :-

HackneyAbbott Diane Abbott MP@Welshbeard @bimadew Dubious of black people claiming they've never experienced racism. Ever tried hailing a taxi I always wonder? About three days ago via Twitter for iPhone Favorite Retweet

comes this gem from Ed Milliband (although he claims it was one of his wonks) concerning the sad death of Bob Holness of Blockbusters fame. Must be that the Diane Debacle has had some effect on his mind:

Still think the EU is a good idea? Watch this and learn!

2011-12-22T11:21:00.003Z

The EU is, and always was, a disaster. If you think any different, just watch this!

More on "Euro Democracy" from Nigel

2011-11-16T11:36:00.003Z

Like all sensible people who despise the way the EU is going, Nigel Farage once again sounds off against van Rumpy Pumpy and his cohorts. I do wish Wavy Davy Cameron would listen!

Please come and take over the UK, Nigel!

2011-10-13T10:46:00.001Z

Once again, Nigel F is telling the buffoons of the EU how it really is!

TV coverage of Red Ed's speech blacked out

2011-09-27T16:11:00.006Z

TV coverage of Red Ed's speech at the Labour Party Conference was blacked out on TV, just about the time he was slagging off Rupert Murdoch. Oh dear, never mind, how sad.

In case they did not get the coverage back in time for him to make his triumphant musical exit, I have got this preprepared clip ready for him!

EU hypocrisy exposed

2011-08-31T10:48:00.002Z

Once again, Dan Hannan has the EU behemoth in his sights, wondering if the EU is qualified to lecture anybody about the democratic process!

Oh, the scam revealed

2011-07-29T10:50:00.007Z

It appears that the Anthropogenic Global Warming Scam is being more and more revealed as just what it is, a scam!

Latest result from NASA show that even with much more carbon dioxide in the atmosphere, the amount heat being lost by the Earth is not changing. This means all the tosh about green energy and windmills etc. is the only way to save the Earth is just that,

TOTAL TOSH.

It shows that that the whole business is just another attempt at control freakery, by those who would be communists, fascists or any one else who likes telling people what they must do, and has failed to do so, so far!

Where is Don Quixote when you need him??

Once again, Dan Hannan hits the nail on the head

2011-05-23T09:52:00.001Z

The video says it all.

I have had it with Wavy Davy

2011-04-06T11:20:00.002Z

Wavy Davy Cameron has just persuaded me that voting Conservative at the moment is a waste of time. He has claimed that the UK has caused many of the world's problems. NO IT HAS NOT.

He also insists that we should still send a huge amount of foreign aid to Pakistan, even though they are just launching a new submarine fleet for £1billion. What with his feeble surrender to the Lib Dums on such things as repealing the appalling Human Rights Act and his brown nosing of all things European, I can no longer see my way to vote Conservative until they get rid of this lunatic and replace him with a proper Conservative leader. In the meantime, UKIP beckons!

Bad, but nowhere near as bad as it could have been.

2011-02-03T12:20:00.002Z

Cyclone Yasi duly hit the Northern Queensland coast in Australia as forecast yesterday. It appears that a lot of damage has been done, but no one has yet been reported killed. I think that is good.

Fortunately, the worst of the cyclone missed the bigger cities, such as Cairns, but there are still possibilities of floods there. Since I have some Australian friends, and also know people who have emigrated there, I am pleased for them, although, as far as I know, they do not live near and were not near the storms when they hit. In any case, I hope the clear up goes well and as quickly as possible, especially as I will be going to Oz later this year.

Read about it here

Dreadful developments in the States

2011-01-11T11:41:00.002Z

The shooting of Democratic Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords and the killing of 6 others in Tucson Arizona was a tragic event. Immediately the "Liberal" press started going on about gun control, loony right wingers etc..

Unfortunately for the MSM the perpetrator turned out to be a completely loony admirer of the Communist Manifesto and a total pothead to boot. Also, Congresswoman Giffords was in favour of gun ownership. Given that, in the States, Liberal has come to mean "Rabid Left-Winger", it is nice see them hoist on their own petard!

It was a truly great American, Thomas Jefferson, who said, "When a government is scared of its people, that is democracy. When a people is scared of its government, that is tyranny!". We could do with a Thomas Jefferson in the UK right now!

A bit of a shame

2010-12-15T12:39:00.004Z

Iain Dale, he of Iain Dale's Diary and one of the earlier political bloggers with a penchant for the Conservatives, has decided he will stop blogging as of now. I think this is a shame as I found his posts both amusing and erudite. I did not always agree with him even though he is a Conservative, but he was never nasty in the way most left wing bloggers are.

His main reason is because he has now got quite a few irons in the fire and does not have time to dedicate to maintaining the quality of his posts. Also, he said he was getting tired of the back-biting, but I guess that is par for the course in politics!

Oh, well

2010-12-03T10:04:00.002Z

It does not really concern me that the UK was humiliated at the FIFA vote for the hosting of the 2018 Football World Cup. I am pretty sure the whole thing was fiddled, and the MSM did not exactly help with their exposure of the corruption of some FIFA members.

Far more importantly, we are hosting the Rugby League World Cup in 2013 and, even more importantly, the Rugby Union World Cup in 2015!

I feel old

2010-10-22T13:56:00.002Z

Today, I reached the milestone age of 65. I am now an old git who is grumpy all the time. Actually, I have been that for ages, but that is what 31 years of Labour governments does to a chap!

It looks like Nigel has recovered

2010-09-15T13:19:00.003Z

It looks like Nigel Farage has recovered from his plane crash. Here are his comments on the "State of the EU" speech by Barroso

Disaster looms on the Web

2010-09-09T11:30:00.002Z

This news had escaped me until I read my Computing magazine today.

Apparently Gordon Brown has been given a position on the board of the World Wide Web Foundation. Should we open a book as to when the whole Web comes crashing down around us?

I would like to volunteer!

2010-08-04T14:20:00.002Z

In the famous words of Corporal Jones, "I would like to volunteer, Sah!"

It turns out that, even if you wear the skimpiest of thongs, it is impossible to get a uniform all over suntan, because the bum has thicker skin than the rest of the body, and therefore does not tan so well. If any further research is needed, I am willing to put my scientific training to good use and aid the research team, but only if the research guinea pigs are nubile young ladies!

If only this had been Mad Hatty!

2010-07-11T09:46:00.002Z

A wonderful picture of the new West British Australian Prime Minister has appeared. It appears she might be as gaffe prone as our recently departed Dear Leader!

There are still cretins out there

2010-06-27T09:28:00.004Z

In the latest opinion polls, the Coalition Budget seems to have gone down, if not well at least as accepted that there was a need for it. However, while the Conservative share of the vote has increased, the Liberal share of the vote has gone down remarkably, but even more surprising the Labour share has gone up. This can only mean one thing:

THERE ARE STILL MANY, MANY CRETINS OUT THERE

He has gone

2010-05-11T19:31:00.001Z

No explanation necessary. Here is some celebratory music:

You bloody fools!

2010-05-07T08:33:00.002Z

To everyone who did not vote Tory on May 6th, there is only one way to describe you. A BLOODY FOOL.

While I respect the right of anyone to have an opinion, I DO NOT necessarily respect that opinion itself. I think that anyone who could not see how dangerous for the country anything but a Tory majority would be at the present time, even with Wavy Davy in charge, is a BLOODY FOOL.

The Dear Leader's Latest Pledges

2010-03-28T11:12:00.001Z

The Dear Leader is trying to emulate Phoney Tony by making 5 pledges that will be instantly broken in the unfortunate event of him being elected. There is no meat on the bones so it seems only fair to help him out by adding a few contents.

Secure the recovery

We will attempt to sort out the mess we have made of the economy and, in the process, bugger it up even more.

Raise family standards

Except when you:

Work in the private sector
Drive a car
Enjoy a pint
Eat food not approved by Nanny
Go on holiday

Build a high tech economy

We will cover the entire country in windmills, except in Layabout voting areas.

Protect frontline services

Yeah, right!

my.telegraph.co.uk/the_locksmith/blog/20...

Strengthen fairness in the community

We don't want all those poor hard done by benefit scroungers having to do any work, they may not have the energy left to vote for us. We will just pile a few more taxes on those mugs who are prepared to work for a living.

Nigel again

2010-02-25T14:09:00.001Z

This time, being less than kind to the European 'president' van Rumpy Pumpy!

A new word is needed.

2010-02-11T12:19:00.003Z

It has been announce that the useless, venal Geoff (Buff) Hoon is to stand down as an M.P. at the next election.

Given that, in the blogosphere, the word "hoon" has come to represent the same word as "berk" does, but without any possible faux-friendly connotation, we will need a new word to describe the useless politicians and their followers that is equally brusque and descriptive. Any ideas?

Another year older and another £1000 in debt

2010-01-22T09:58:00.004Z

The bill for the Gurning Loon's idiocy has gone up another £1000 each today!

Doctor Bollocks

2010-01-03T10:48:00.001Z

Most people know the Dear Leader is an overweening incompetent when it comes to running a country, an economy or a whelk stall, but did you know he is a Doctor of Philosophy? He was awarded (blagged) a Ph.D. on the subject of 'The Labour Party and Political Change in Scotland 1918-29' . The results of this study are, of course, as much use in the real world as a chocolate teapot.

To start the New Year of with a swing, I think we should suggest some equally useful subjects for Ph.D. projects. My suggestion is as follows:-

"Subject:

A study of auditory experience of flatus in a dermatological aqueous detergent solution

Abstract:

This study tests the hypothesis that the noises made by a fart in the bath depends on the food consumed to source the gas. A series of experiments was carried out using volunteers who consumed solely baked beans or brussel sprouts or chicken vindaloo. Their ablutions were monitored for audio volume and tone of the fart bubbles. It was concluded that there was no correlation between food consumed and audio volume or tone of the farts in the bath. However, a strong correlation between tone and volume and the juxtaposition of buttocks, thighs and (where appropriate) dangly bits was noted. The results also suggest that a further study should be made as to the filtering effect of bath water on farts with respect to global warming"

Notes;

That last sentence should provide provide another three years funding for research into AGW

I am sure some amongst you bloggers can come up with more imaginative research projects to waste money on as well. Any ideas? A subject would be good, and an abstract even better..

The broom closet

2009-12-17T14:25:00.004Z

MacDoom really is trying to convince the world he IS a one-eye Scottish idiot. Here he is leading Gore the Bore into what might well be the broom cupboard!

Nicked from Guido Fawkes

If only....

2009-12-09T16:48:00.002Z

There has been a tendency over the past to name inns and hotels after historical events. Let us hope this one is pre-cognitive!

http://www.brownleavescountryhotel.co.uk/

So that is it, then?

2009-11-03T10:07:00.002Z

So Boy David, the Heir to Blair, does not want my vote then? He, like Blair has reneged on a promise to hold a referendum on the Lisbon Treaty. a.k.a Constitution. This will be VERY, VERY bad for the UK and the British way of life. There is no reason why a referendum cannot be held and the certain result of an overwhelming NO used as a very strong bargaining chip!

Therefore, although I was going to hold my nose and vote Tory this time, there can only be one way to vote now, UKIP. If it means another 5 years of New Labour, so be it! Actually, they will be lucky to last a year before the revolution comes.

Thomas the Tank Engine

2009-10-11T12:18:00.001Z

The other day, I was waiting at home for a parcel to be delivered and I was getting bored with reading and surfing so I put the TV on in the middle of the day. Little did I realise what rubbish is on daytime TV; those who complain about or mock it are fully justified.

As we get our TV service via Virgin Media cable, I went to the TV on Demand service. While flipping through the choices, I noticed a whole series of Thomas the Tank Engine episodes. I used to love my parents reading the Rev Audrey's stories about railway engines to me at bedtime, and our kids loved us to read the same stories to them.

I decided to watch one of the episodes and there he was, my favourite tank engine. It was about a childrens' firework party. The script said that the children loved climbing onto Thomas and he loved to stand and watch the children playing! Crikey, I thought to myself. I hope he has been CRB checked!!

See Thomas here :-)

Read this, Gordon, you moron

2009-09-20T11:07:00.002Z

It appears that at least some people know how to get out of recession. The Swedish Government are proposing an income tax cut, and a cut in public spending to boost employment in the private sector.

Are you reading this, Gorgon, or your puppet Alistair? Or even David Cameron or Georgie Porgie Osborne?

Our Dan at it again

2009-08-26T13:30:00.002Z

This time on Internet TV

Why isn't he Prime Minister in Waiting?

We could do with a few more Mayors like this

2009-08-19T10:46:00.007Z

The Blair/Brown Terror's hope that, by having a load of directly elected Mayors, this would expand their disastrous hegemony still further seems to have gone rather wrong. Firstly, we have Boris making far less of a mess of London that Captain Newt, and now we have this guy, Peter Davies, Mayor of Doncaster and an English Democrat.

Here is a list of his priorities, taken straight from the local goverment site at Doncaster. There is hope yet!!

Progress / Key decisions since taking office

· Appointed a mixed Cabinet of committed Councillors

· Cut Mayor's salary from around £73,000 to £30,000 per year

· Axed Mayor's chauffeur driven car (approximately £6,000)

· Stopped future funding for gay pride event (£3,000)

· Stopped council newspaper Doncaster News

· Directed that two children's social worker posts be reinstated at Doncaster Royal Infirmary to specifically assist children in hospital and to help detect abuse

· Axed membership of Local Government Association and Local Government Information Unit (approximately £80,000)

· Where possible, stopped funding for translation services and instead encourage people to learn English

· Cut twinning ties with five towns saving approximately £4,000+

· Written to the Electoral Commission to cut the number of Councillors from 63 to 21 which could save upwards of £1,000,000

Future priorities

· Lower Council Tax by cutting extortionate levels of bureaucracy and other waste

· End malpractice and mismanagement in the council

· Hold a referendum on the Mayoral governance of Doncaster

· Reduce the number of councillors from 63 to 21

· Conduct a review of the A638 Quality Bus Corridor and the traffic mayhem around the Dome

· Scrap politically correct non-jobs and encourage the former employees to seek meaningful employment

· Encourage every school to opt out of local authority control – money should go directly to schools to raise deteriorating educational standards

· Ensure police concentrate resources on catching criminals

· Introduce zero tolerance of anti-social behaviour and impose penalties for such everyday practices as using foul language in public and spitting in the street

· Halt the architectural vandalism of Doncaster and protect the town’s heritage

Election countdown

2009-08-19T10:43:00.002Z

Unless the Dark Lord of the Sith can find a way of stopping it, this is the maximum time before we have a General Election and remove the Brown/Blair/Mandleson Terror once and for all, I hope

Nigel strikes again

2009-07-16T15:19:00.001Z

Nigel Farage lambasts the EUSSR yet again. Fabulous stuff!!

Will the idiots in the HoC never learn

2009-07-01T16:43:00.003Z

What on earth persuaded anyone to put Gorbals Mick up for a peerage, and why didn't the Queen just say "No"? I believe she has some options in the matter when such a request is made.

The Great British Unwashed are absolutely sick of incompetence and greed being rewarded at the highest (or should that be the lowest?) level. I think the powers that be had better think again, if they do not want the riots on the streets that David Ceameron is so worried about!

Latest downfall video

2009-06-08T10:22:00.002Z

Our Dear Leader celebrates Labour's success in the 2009 Euro elections:

HT ManWiddicombe

The etymology of "hoon"

2009-06-03T11:18:00.003Z

Some of you may have seen the word "hoon" appearing in various blogs and other articles. In case any of you were wondering what it means and how it was derived, I will tell you.

It is, of course, derived from the name of Geoff "Buff" Hoon, one of the most odious of the odious hoons that make up the present (2009) Labour government. But what does it mean, you ask?

It is basically the same word as berk is in Cockney ryhming slang, except that you can call someone a berk, in faux offensive manner, whereas if you call someone a hoon, you really mean it!

If you do not know what berk means, think Berkhampstead (not Berkeley, that is American) Hunt!

Gotcha

2009-05-19T13:49:00.001Z

In the words of the Sun, "Gotcha!"

This sums it all up

2009-05-10T08:52:00.002Z

This posting on Youtube seems to sum up everything concerning MPs' expenses fiddles

Boo the Buggers!

2009-04-20T13:10:00.002Z

From here on in, I think it behoves us all to BOO very loudly whenever a Labour politician tries to make a speech. It has been apparent for some time that anything spouted in public by a Labour politician ia bound to be completely untrue, so the next time one appears near you, hopimg for a photo-opportunity, start booing loudly and making rude gestures, so it does not help the MSM by editing out the sound of booing.

Of course, politicians of other persuasions are not much better, but they should be allowed to speak before being booed!

Brown Stained

2009-04-17T10:38:00.003Z

It is with great pleasure I (belatedly) report that Guido Fawkes, aka Paul Staines, has nailed the odious Damien MacBride for sending out false email smears about various Tory grandees and their families. What a hoon!

I suppose that with his fingers crossed "apology" to a camera crew in Glasgow, the Snotgoblin thinks that the world believes that he had nothing to do with it. Far be from me to accuse him of any complicity but, really......

Still, all of this agro seems to be taking its toll on the Dear Leader. It could not happen to a more deserving hoon

Looks like nobody likes the Dear Leader now

2009-03-25T10:05:00.003Z

When Crash Gordon appeared at the European Parliament there were some speeches along the lines of, "What a tosser you are". Beware of low flying Nokias!!

Here are two of them. We need people like this in Westminster

Nigel Farage of UKIP

Dan Hannan Conservative

WIHIH

2009-03-15T16:57:00.002Z

The England Rugby Union played very well today against France (34-10) but they still lack the ruthlessnes to absolutely crush them, which they should have done. If they had played like this against Wales or Ireland, they would have demolished them. Consistency, please gentlemen!

England at it again

2009-02-28T19:13:00.002Z

I cannot watch any more. The English Rugby prima donnas are giving the game against Ireland away by giving away endless penalties. PLEASE, PRETTY PLEASE Jonno, please drop these idiots once and for all and fine them their match fees!

Stable door

2009-02-22T12:45:00.002Z

So the monocular Caledonian Cretin thinks that the bankers have been naughty, dishing out too much money, and should be our servants and not our masters, eh? I wonder who he thinks let them do it in the first place?

Please re-arrange the following words into a well know phrase or saying:

Stable after the bolted has shutting horse the door.

Getting better slowly

2009-02-16T11:53:00.002Z

This weekend, England at least looked like a team that wanted to play Rugby against Wales, in fact all of the best moves were English. But, as usual, they were let down by the idiotic sin binning of two players and some senseless penaties. Without these, England would have won!

For goodness sake, Jonno, STOP PICKING THESE IDIOTS!

Absolute Crap

2009-02-07T21:04:00.002Z

The England Rugby team do not seem to have learnt anything from last year's debacle. They are still too slow to get the ball away from the ruck, they still kick away all decent possession and, worst of all, they still keep giving away senseless penaties. They only beat Italy because they were crap as well, and even then, the score flattered them.

Jonno, please get rid of all the prima donnas, this is getting just like soccer! You might as well pick Old Wankorians A XV to represent England (All the names in this post are fictitious, apart from Jonno!)

Jeremy doesn't like Gordon, apparently!

2009-02-06T09:21:00.004Z

At an Australian press conference promoting Top Gear, Jeremy Clarkson described The Dear Leader as "a one-eyed, Scottish idiot".

While I don't approve of mocking the affflicted, and some of my best friends are Scottish, I think the remark is grossly unfair to idiots!

What a tit!

2009-02-01T11:01:00.001Z

Gordon Brown has compared himself to the artist Titian!

Well, he is half right. He is a complete and total TIT!

The New Hope?

2009-01-21T10:55:00.003Z

It is done now, and Barrack Obama has been installed as the latest American President.

The whole world seems to be celebrating over this fact, and he does seem to offer some hope. My only fear is that he will turn out to be like Tony the Phoney Blair and just be a good orator while leaving the running of the country to a bunch of malevolent incompetents who ruin the place. At least he does not seemingly have his own equivalent of Gordon Brown to wreck everything, but I would not mind betting Hilary Clinton will turn out to be a disaster. This could be his plan, of course, to make sure she can never run for President. If so, hats off to him.

I sincerely hope I am wrong in all these suppositions, but I have more than a sneaking suspicion that I am not!

Serves him right

2009-01-08T15:47:00.001Z

I see Boris Johnson. Mayor of London, got done for not paying his congestion charge. Serves him right for not abolishing it the moment he came to power!!

Blubber power

2008-12-24T23:27:00.003Z

I saw this story linked to from Theo Spark's blog Last of the Few.

It appears some cosmetic surgeon is being investigated for using the blubber extracted from his clients during liposuction to make bio-diesel to power his 4x4.

It seems to me that the government (that's a laugh calling that shambles a government) has missed a trick here. If everyone were compulsorily weighed once a month, and everyone whose Body Mass Index exceeded goverment targets was forced to undergo liposuction, then any supposed fossil fuel problem would be over! Think of all the other advantages:

Gormless Gordon could get on with the job of saving the world
Badger Darling could raises tax on peoples' own blubber (plus VAT at 15%)
Jackboot Jacqui could be even more draconian and make life even worse for hard-working families (chavs would be exempt from the process, of course)
Health Gauleiter Johnson could make the health fascists feel even more smug

Every one wins, except for the Great British Public, naturally!

Oh what a surprise!

2008-12-07T15:26:00.002Z

It appears that the goverment (and I used that term in its loosest possible sense) has been fibbing yet again. It turns out that windmills will not be the answer to a maiden's prayer after all and we shall still have to use coal and nuclear power

ABSOLUTE BLOODY CRAP

2008-11-22T16:43:00.004Z

England were duly thrashed by South Africa at Twickenham today 6-42. South Africa were good, much better than Australia last week BUT, England were even worse than they were last week. They were absolute crap. One or two England players made some effort but most just seemed to be on autopilot!

After the match, Jonno was saying we are working on the problems and all the usual platitudes, but the fact remains that some of the England team are way past their sell-by date and some are just not good enough. Also, good player though he is, Steve Borthwick is no captain. We need another captain of Jonno's ability.

The other problem seems to be discipline. So many stupid penalties given away. It is about time that consistent penalty offenders had their match fee reduced in proportion to the number of penalties given away! Drastic action is needed.

All I can say is "BUGGER, BUGGER, BUGGER"

At least we can see who supports South Africa, where is Erica Roe when you need her?

Here we go again in 2008

2008-11-15T16:38:00.003Z

After a false dawn last week, the England Rugby Union team proved, once again, that they are not well organised. They lost 14-28 to a reasonable but not briliiant Australian side who were also helped by rather a lot of strange decisions by the Southern Hemisphere ref from South Africa!

None the less, England were outplayed and while there is some excuse for the younger members of the side due to inexperience, some of the older members of the team played really badly. Jonno has a big task on his hands, methinks!

Just desserts

2008-11-04T17:53:00.003Z

I have been away with Mrs MikeyP for a while, taking a long holiday in the USA to celebrate my retirement with a livable pension.

Therefore, we had not heard about the furore concerning Woss and Bwand and their idiotic answerphone "pwank" on Andrew Sachs. All I can say is that they are both total tossers, and vastly overpaid for what little talent they have, or at least display.

I think that they have not yet received their full just desserts, which would be to be expunged from everyone's memory and end up doing a lowly paid job as no-one else would employ them. Unfortunately, given the attention span of the Great British Public, I don't expect that to happen any day now!

Micawber or Mugabe

2008-09-28T11:23:00.003Z

I can never decide whether Gordon Brown reminds me of Mr Micawber or Robert Mugabe

One was always waiting for something to turn up and hoping for the best and the other stole all the assets from hardworking people to reward all his cronies, who promptly went and wasted them.

On second thoughts, he seems like a combination of the two, but maybe without the charisma!

Witches and Wizards

2008-09-20T11:24:00.002Z

It appears that JK Rowling has finally become unhinged by all that dosh she has earned from what I think are very boring and weird books, and has donated a million squids to ZanuLabour. All I can say is that we knew what to do with witches and wizards in the good old days!

Visceral hatred

2008-08-31T10:37:00.003Z

I do not do hatred normally. BUT, Gordon Brown invokes such a visceral hatred in me for how he has ruined this country that I hope that capital punishment for treason is re-instated and he is the first to be tried under the new regime.

The only other politicians who come close to creating such emotion in me are Tony Blair, who was only really the Snot Goblin's mouthpiece anyway and Edward Heath, who lied about joining a Common Market, instead of a fascist socialist superstate.

There have been plenty of other incompetent Labour Prime Ministers (all of them actually) but none of the others have deliberately tried to sell the country out to foreign interests.

Now what are they up to?

2008-08-23T17:02:00.005Z

My good lady and I went on holiday to Cornwall recently, and, rather than my usual modes of transport, i.e. driving or flying (UP YOURS, GORE), we travelled by coach, so I had more time to pay attention to more than just the traffic. On the motorways I noticed some newish signs consisting of the motorway number, and what seemed to be distance markers, but using METRIC distances.

A bit of Googling told me that these signs are used by the emergency services to locate accidents and breakdowns, and that seems very sensible. The only thing is, I could not find confirmatIon that the distances were in miles.

Is this yet another bit of this despicable government's trying to force on the Great British unwashed yet something else they have expressed no desire for, using stealth?

The latest greenie bollocks

2008-08-07T12:10:00.002Z

It turns out that someone has done a PROPER study of the benefits of using windpower to generate electricty. Suprisingly, the results are published on the BBC website, not normally known for its debunking of green myths.

Basically, they are saying that putting a wind turbine on your roof will save you approximately £10-00 a year. As the initial cost of such a turbine is £1500 it takes 150 years for the thing to pay for itself. I don't suppose any of the wind power loonies are going to say anything about that!

Another example of MacTwattery

2008-07-27T11:53:00.002Z

Only a buffoon like Gordon Brown would choose to go on holiday in a part of the country where his wunnerful government (I use that word in it's loosest possible sense) is abandoning the coast to the sea, because they cannot afford to shore it up AND bribe lots of ex-Labour voters to vote for them again. How I hate and despise that man!

Read all about it here

This is where Brown should be heading

2008-07-18T14:53:00.003Z

The bastard has sent the ratification of the Lisbon ~~Constitution~~ Treaty to Rome, so, to the Tower with him, and Off With His Head

Happy Independence Day

2008-07-04T08:08:00.002Z

Happy Independence Day to any American surfer who should come across this blog.

In spite of what some goons in this country say, the majority of people are only too happy to deal with you. You do do many things wrong, from driving on the wrong side of the road upwards, you do do so much right as well. You vote a slightly wonky president into power, but we voted (not) a complete imbecile to be our Glorious Leader.

I hope you all enjoy your day. The Missus and I are meeting up with my son and American daughter-in-law later today, and we shall have a good time.

More rubbish

2008-06-28T17:29:00.002Z

Just watched England being thrashed in the last cricket ODI by a no better than average New Zealand side. I don't think Jonah MacBogey had turned to support hem (It was England, after all) so why the hell did they play so bloody badly?

I think it is time to start paying, or not paying, professional sportsmen and women by results!

It will soon be illegal to be a white Englishman

2008-06-26T15:37:00.005Z

It would appear that Harridan Harperson, ZanuLabour harpie of some renown, is preparing the ground to make being a white Englishman an offence, or at least a taxable item (I don't suppose it will apply to the so-called Celtic races, even though nearly all of them are of the same basic stock i.e. Scandinavian, as many English) . Time to change government and government thinking completely, methinks, not just watered down Blue Labour!

What's wrong with you all?

2008-06-20T15:36:00.004Z

That is what out of touch junior minister Tom Harris asked?

If he has to ask, he has not got a clue. Let's see now:

We have a bunch of self-serving, mendacious, treacherous buffoons running the country
The alternative to the above bunch are only slightly better
Our economy has been ruined over the last 10 years
Our education system has been ruined over the last 10 years
Our armed forces have been ruined over the last 30 years (Yes even Maggie is guilty here)
We are being made to feel guilty for even existing, if we are English WASPs
Our taxes are being wasted hand over fist by a bunch of corrupt incompetents in this country and in the EU
Our leaders are trying to subsume our identity into a European one

Is that enough to be going on with. I am sure anyone with a brain out there could add some more. Doh!

Thank you

2008-06-13T20:37:00.002Z

Thank you Ireland, for telling the Eurofascists where to stick their ~~constitution~~ treaty.

About to go on a short break to Wales

2008-06-05T16:03:00.004Z

Going to see Portmeirion (The Village) and the Ffestiniog Railways amongst other goodies. Both the MemSahib and myself are looking forward to it. Might even have a few pictures later, who knows?

UPDATE:
We had a great time. Went on both the Ffestiniog and Welsh Highland Railway, and went inside Electric Mountain to see the Dinorwig Pumped Storage Hydroeletric power station. The Village was very good too, but I did not see any signs of Rover, the rampant weather balloon! I forgot my camera, but took some video.

Yabba Dabba Doo

2008-05-23T15:19:00.003Z

After the Nantwich and Crewe by-election result, the great Bogeyman seems to be presiding over the terminal decline of the Labour Party. It does not matter if people voted for Boy Dave Cameron or not (and I suspect an increasing number did), the main point is that they did not vote for a NuLabour apparatchik of the worst kind.

Roll on the General Election. There are still many things wrong with the Tories, but at least they appear to be on the same planet as the rest of us.

A great shame

2008-05-20T17:07:00.004Z

On Sunday, in the Premiership semi-final, Danny Cipriani, the up and coming Wasps and England fly half, received an horrific injury when he was double tackled and the maul fell on top of him. He suffered a fracture dislocation of his right ankle, which is immensely painful and takes a long time to heal, even with immediate and specialist medical attention. This means he is out of the Premiership final and the forthcoming England tour. I hope he recovers as quickly as possible, and is back playing the game once he is ready.

When I played Rugby, many years ago, a friend of mine suffered a similar injury. It was horrible, as his foot was almost pointing backwards. He never played again, but he did take up refereeing, and pinged me many times, the bastard!

My best wishes goes to Danny and all others injured playing this most beautiful of games.

Labour's new mantra

2008-05-15T12:31:00.003Z

AFter all the gerrymandering of the last decade, I think it is time that Labour had a new mantra. No longer is it "From each according to his means, to each according to his needs" (which, although well-meaning, is a load of tosh) but should be "From each according to what we says his means are, to each according to his vote!"

I hate socialism, but I despise New Labour

The beginning of the end for El Gordo.

2008-05-03T11:07:00.003Z

Let us hope that the recent results in the local and London mayoral elections mark the beginning of the end for the snot-gobbling Scottish bogey man and his evil cohorts.

The trouble is, while the Conswervatives will undoubtedly do a better job of running the country and its capital than ZanuLabour, they are hardly the eurosceptic, tax cutting party that this country needs to regain any chance of being successful again.

Still, isn't it wonderfully ironic that some countries celebrate May 2nd as St Boris Day? Maybe this should be the early May bank holiday in the UK from now on!

Brown would lose to Cameron

2008-04-27T12:21:00.004Z

That ever observant and perceptive twat Tony Blair has been put on record as saying that Brown will lose to Cameron in a general election. Gosh, really, surely not? Brown would lose if his main opponent was Mickey Mouse, because he is an even bigger twat than Blair.

The trouble is that Cameron is not really a suitable guy to get the country out of the huge mess the last 10 years of Labour Government have put it in. All he could honestly say, given the policies and initiatives he has proposed so far, is "Under the Conservatives, life will be slightly less awful for normal, hard-working folks and slightly less cushy for work-shy benefit scroungers".

That is not good enough in my book, but you never know, he may see the light if he gets into No. 10. We can but hope!

Please, MyTelegraph

2008-04-13T15:09:00.002Z

I have another blog on MyTelegraph that I use more or less exclusively for ranting about the auto-eroticists who would rule us. At the moment, it is a total disaster. It keeps going down, losing posts and comments, swapping IDs and goodness knows what else.

The techies keep saying they are working with Microsoft to get it working properly. I say to them, "Please, pretty, pretty, please, forget Microsoft, take the whole site down for a couple of days, and install a LAMP system. (Linux, Apache, MySQL, PHP)

Take the hint, Gordy

2008-04-02T11:41:00.002Z

Bertie Ahern has resigned to avoid investigations into corruption in Ireland. One down, lets us hope one to go!

Mikey's got a brand new toy

2008-03-24T09:34:00.002Z

Managed to get an Asus eee PC 4G over the weekend. It is a very nice little bit of kit, allowing you to surf and work anywhere. Will not be blogging much for a while thanks to this little toy.

Read all about it here

There is hope for England Rugby

2008-03-15T15:35:00.004Z

While most of the present England XV seem well past their sell-by date, the U20 team has just won the U20 Grand Slam by beating the very good Irish U20 team handsomely. The players all seem very skilled and very keen, as do the coaching staff. Cannot wait until they all get their chance in the senior side.

Update
So England were not so bad as feared and managed a reasonable win against an Irish side not really firing on all cylinders. All the best players were the younger ones!

USELESS BLOODY ENGLAND

2008-03-08T17:08:00.004Z

Scotland 15 England 9 Calcutta Cup

What excuse do England have this time? What does Ashton say to inspire them? You might as well play an amateur 2nd XV. At least they might play as a team!

Scotland were pretty bad, but they did not need to be good, because England were complete and total CRAP!

Time for a lot of bloodletting at team selection, from the coach downwards. I would rather see players who are maybe not quite so individually talented, but are prepared to play as a team!

Also, it is about time to start fining players who give away needless penalties, or keep kicking possession away to no purpose, their match fee!

Why, oh why?

2008-02-24T13:04:00.002Z

Why didn't England play against Wales as they played against France? If they had done, they would have beaten them easily, and would be leading the 6 Nations table. Still, I think Wales might get their comeuppance against Ireland and France. I do hope so, because I am old enough to remember their arrogance during the 70's!

Will no-one rid us of this turbulent priest?

2008-02-09T10:56:00.000Z

"Will no-one rid us of this turbulent priest?" to mis-quote King Henry, talking about the Archbishop of Canterbury. Someone needs to do it, though it is probably best not to use the same method as was used to remove Thomas a'Beckett from office.

If it looks like a superannuated hippie, walks like a superannuated hippie and talks like a superannuated hippie, then it is a superannuated hippie.

As this man's one aim in life seems to be to lay back and let the world sweep over him and be at peace, man, he is not suitable to be head of the CofE. I am NOT in any way religious but I do recognise that the Christian way of life is a sensible way to go and sharia law is NOT!

It is not just his pronouncement on sharia law that is so ridiculous, but almost everything he says. He has to go!

Here we go again!!!

2008-02-02T18:27:00.000Z

Once again, the England Rugby XV have managed to give away another game. Leading 19-3 at half time (it should have been 26-3 but for a dodgy video ref decision) they gave Wales every chance by giving away lots of stupid penalties and allowing them to score soft tries. I think the players should be paid by results, i.e. not paid when they give in so shamefully.

There must be something wrong at the RFU, when they cannot work out a way to let the best coach in the country, i.e. Shaun Edwards, coach part-time. Wales seemed to have managed it.

Furthermore, they will not let us sing a National Anthem, so we have to sing the dirge of the UK one instead. Get it together you guys, or give way for people who care!

Merchant Banker

2008-01-10T18:23:00.000Z

So, Tony Bliar has been given a part time job with an American bank. Well, he always was a merchant banker. For those who do not understand, I can only say one thing. "Apples and pears!"

Happy New Year

2008-01-01T12:33:00.000Z

A Happy New Year to all my readers (if there are any :-). It would be an even happier New Year if Bottler MacBean were to be abducted by aliens. As well as ridding us of the scumbag, it might well also defer any potential extra-terrestrial alien invasion, if the aliens thought that the Tartan Tax Thief was a typical human being!

One-eyed snake

2007-12-23T09:10:00.000Z

Normally, us chaps refer to a piece of our trouser equipment as the one-eyed snake, but in this case, I am referring to Gordon Brown.

Firstly, as any fule kno, he is a total knob, aka one-eyed snake.

Secondly, although I normally frown severely on mocking the afflicted, I am happy to make an exception in the case of this despicable apology for a snot-eating human being! Gordon Brown really does have only one working eye, and certainly lacks vision!

Thirdly, who but a treacherous snake would sign away 1000 years of English history in secret! Also, we must not forget that, although his Holiness the Bliar was the figure-head for all the disaster that has befallen the UK in general and England in particular, the Tartan Tax Thief was behind all the micro-management and control freakery that has occurred since 1997.

QED, Gordon Brown is a One-Eyed Snake!

A good game of Rugby

2007-12-01T17:28:00.000Z

I have just watched a very good game of Rugby on the TV, in which The Barbarians beat South Africa 22-5. It was also a poignant occasion as it was Jason "Billy Whiz" Robinson's last competitive game. He played well but did not score and was substituted towards the end. Still, it was an exciting game to watch and I enjoyed it very much.

More good news is the next World Cup will have 20 teams, as this year. This will enable some of the minnows to appear on the world stage and gain support for Rugby in their countries. Wish I was still young enough to play!

I noticed this the other day

2007-11-29T11:40:00.000Z

I noticed an article in the Daily Telegraph the other day, commenting on what proportion of their lives the ladies take in preparing to go out. I have not made a scientific study in my case, but I reckon that the article is somewhere near the truth! :-)

Brown boycotts Mugabe at EU-Africa summit

2007-11-27T18:22:00.000Z

The Tartan Tax Thief refuses to attend a meeting with Robert Mugabe.

I would have thought that Bottler Brown would have been only too happy to meet Butcher Bob to get a few hints on how to run a country into the ground more quickly and create a cadre of dependency voters to keep him in power!

Proof if proof were needed

2007-11-21T22:27:00.000Z

England's rugby team were only pretending to be crap at the beginning of the World Cup, they proved to be second in the world in the end.

On the other hand, the England football team have just confirmed, by losing to Croatia in the European Cup qualifier that they are bunch of overpaid, under-skilled, prancing prima donnas. A plague upon all their houses, I say!!

Oh what a great idea!

2007-11-19T18:15:00.000Z

Vince Cable, caretaker leader of the Illiberal Non-democrats, has suggested the way to solve Northern Rock's financial woes is to nationalise it. Vince, my lad, are you a complete idiot? Don't you remember what happened last time something big was nationalised? Here is a clue, we are still suffering from it after nearly 60 years

Walls against millipedes

2007-11-11T12:11:00.000Z

When I saw the news that a German town was building a wall to keep out millipedes I thought they had decided to keep that obnoxious little twerp David Milliband (aka Miilipede) out. No such luck, they were really trying to keep an invasion of the many legged beasties away! I think I would prefer the millipedes to Milliband and those of his ilk. Less slimy!

Mel Brooks Musical

2007-11-10T11:03:00.000Z

First let me make it clear that I love all the things that Mel Brooks does. I have many of his DVDs, and I have seen the Producers in the West End theatre, and have both versions of the film.

I am just not so sure about turning Young Frankenstein into a musical now showing on Broadway. I hope it is a huge hit but I am just not so sure, as many of the jokes in the original film do not seem to be so suitable for converting to song.

Oh well, I will just have to wait until I get a chance to see it :-)

BUGGER and double BUGGER

2007-10-20T20:52:00.000Z

A combination of a few silly English moments, some strange refereeing decisions and an Aussie video ref meant that England narrowly lost to the Springboks, 6-15. Roll on 2011

I never thought it possible

2007-10-13T21:21:00.000Z

Well done England Rugby team. World Cup Final again!! Up yours, Gordon Brown!!!

Isn't it nice to beat the Aussies (again) ??

2007-10-06T17:53:00.000Z

After all the arrogant bluster from the Aussie camp, England beat them 12-10 in the World Cup. It was not a pretty game, but at last England are learning that you start trying to play pretty Rugby when you are 20 points ahead!

Unfortunately, the big mouthed Aussie from work has left so I cannot rub his face in it, and we just have a much more polite Kiwi to contend with. I suspect I might not be able to rub his face in it next week, but, hey, England are playing much better again.

You never know what might happen next week, but they will have to raise their game still more to beat the All Blacks (or France if the pull off an equally unlikely win tonight!)

Back to the Gloucester/Leicester game for the second half now.

Update:

Well done, France! Those are words I thought I would never utter! Now looking forward to ragging Kiwi Bloke at work rotten!

The World Cup

2007-09-30T16:38:00.000Z

Of the home nations only England seem to have any chance of progressing further than the quarter finals, and that hope is fairly remote. Wales and Ireland are out and Scotland were incredibly lucky to qualify.

We had all better start planning for 2011!

Ok, so England are not a total loss

2007-09-22T16:17:00.000Z

At times, in today's game against Samoa, England looks a half-decent Rugby side, but they still had patches where they looked like amateurs. At least with Jonny Wilkinson fit again and Olly Barkley back, the backs looked as if they wanted to score occasionally

Final score 44-22

Nearly had an interesting turnaround in the South Africa/Tonga game. Tonga almost won and were a bit unlucky not too! Could be a bit tricky for England next week!

Final score 30-25

It is official

2007-09-14T20:55:00.000Z

England's present Rugby Union team are CRAP with a capital K!

England 0 - South Africa 36

I gave up watching at half time and switched to the Super League. At least that was exciting!

Update:

Wales were better but not by that much, except for a couple of patches. Have to wait and see what Ireland do now!

Yippee

2007-09-07T20:58:00.000Z

First blood in the Rugby World Cup to Argentina!

France 12 - 17 Argentina

Let us hope England do not bog up tomorrow now!